Creating Christmas Magic for Your Children When You’re Navigating Grief

When Magic Making and Grief Collide

The Christmas season often arrives with mixed feelings, especially when you’re carrying grief. Christmas music, holiday cheer, and snow-covered trees with twinkling lights signal a magical time of year, though many parents are feeling the weight of loss. Perhaps this is the time of year where you experienced the loss of a parent, friend, job, or identity.

Despite this loss, there’s still a desire to create something warm, reassuring, and magical for your children. You’re not alone in feeling this way. There is no one ‘right’ way to make this Christmas season special for your family; there is only what feels manageable, compassionate, and real for you.

Savour the Small Moments

It can be helpful to give yourself permission to simplify. Children don’t remember the extravagant traditions or the perfectly decorated trees. Children remember the moments together – reading a story together, drinking hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, and singing Christmas carols. If you have limited energy this holiday season, choose one or two traditions to honour and let the rest go. Savour the small, gentle moments together creating magic.

Share the Memories

Instead of trying to hide the grief, acknowledge the person or experience you’re grieving. Children are more aware than we realize. Sharing a memory of your loved one, hanging a special ornament, or taking a quiet moment to remember can help children understand that sadness and joy can coexist.

Grief and Joy Can Coexist

Equally as important, allow yourself to feel what you feel. By modelling authentic emotions, it gives permission to children to express theirs, too. If the day becomes overwhelming, it’s ok to take a moment to step outside, breathe, reset, and return when you’re ready.

Finally, ask for support. Share tasks with friends and family. Accept help wherever you can with food, shopping, or childcare. Asking for help doesn’t diminish your strength, it protects it.

Showing up Even When Tender

Creating Christmas magic for children when grieving isn’t about perfection. It’s about showing up with love, even when feeling so tender. By doing so, you are giving the most powerful gift of all – the gift of understanding, connection, kindness, and precious moments of joy.

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Resilience: The Strength that Grows in the Dark https://www.balancepsychservices.ca/post/resilience-the-strength-that-grows-in-the-dark

How to Prevent Holiday Stress for Your Children https://www.balancepsychservices.ca/post/holiday-stress-in-children

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Information provided through Balance Psychological Services' blog posts is meant for educational purposes only. This is NOT medical or mental health advice. If you are seeking mental health advice, please contact us directly at (587) 985-3132.